Colors of Love: Green in New Love

Green color is associated in the positive sense with life, growth and peace and with envy on the negative side. This post will touch on all of these in the context of limerence.

New Love Budding

A new romantic relationship can be compared to a plant taking root and blossoming. After the seed has sprouted, its roots dig into the soil and green leaves open to the sun. In a romantic relationship, the roots are a foundation of love and trust and common interests. The green leaves may be considered to be giving each other space to breathe and flourish individually.

As the plant matures, flowers begin to bud and then bloom. Similarly, a couple’s relationship is nurtured until it blossoms into a thing of beauty. Just as a rose garden emanates a sweet fragrance to greenspace, watching a young couple falling in love brings joy. It is a universally happy cycle, repeated from one generation to the next. The most aged generations glean the greatest joy from seeing true love begin in their children and grandchildren.

The Bible says angels rejoice when a lost person becomes saved (Luke 15:7). Once they turn to Jesus, new love and new life have begun. They have embarked upon a growth journey, one that will be filled with pruning and flowering alike in due season. Jesus will be with them from then on, leading them toward the green pastures He always intended for them.

The Grass Is Always Greener…

There is a well-known saying, “The grass is always greener on the other side.” The idea is that usually people are not satisfied where they are in life. They constantly pursue the next improvement to their lives – maybe a new car, a bigger house, a higher paying job. If only they can have that next thing, they will be happy. At least that is what they think.

For limerents, the pursuit is toward their new love interest. They have felt the spark of the glorious glimmer and believe their lives will be complete with him or her. Reciprocation will, they feel, bring peace and fullness of life which they could not otherwise enjoy. The green of that grass, so to speak, is unmatched in their minds.

Of course, this is erroneous thinking. Nothing and no one in this world can complete us or suddenly make us feel content. Jesus is the only one who will never disappoint us and who will never cease to amaze us. We only need to keep following Him, step by step.

Paul sets a good example for us as written in Philippians 4:11. “I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” He experienced both wealth and poverty, both fullness and hunger, and he found that Jesus was enough in either case. The grass is green enough where we are now. Even if it looks more like a desert than a well-watered front lawn, Jesus is our strength (4:13). That is decidedly sufficient.

Envy

My limerence transferred from one boy to another, two major times. Basically, the current object of my affection was a replacement for the previous. The three in order were My Sweet Anonymous, My Sweet Beloved and the One Who Keeps My Smiles Alive.

When the latter chose to be with another girl over me, I was heartbroken and envious. It was like living the rejection from My Sweet Beloved all over again. Simply seeing couples holding hands in public was painful – I wished I had someone’s hand to hold too.

I happen to have green eyes, which I have noticed become a brighter green when filled with tears. They displayed that brighter green very frequently after the One Who Keeps My Smiles Alive chose the other girl. Primarily, this is true because of the water in my eyes physically changing the appearance of the iris color. However, it is also true in the sense that I was envious of anyone my age who was in a romantic relationship.

It is frustrating when, no matter what we do, we don’t get what we want. Sometimes it even becomes exhausting because of all the energy spent working toward our goal. However, God does not deny us His rich blessings if we trust and follow Him. Psalm 84:11 – “The Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.”

Sometimes He asks us to wait before He bestows certain blessings on us. When we feel so intensely as in limerence that our needs are not being met, waiting is very hard. “But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength,” Isaiah 40:31 says. “They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.”

Green Pastures and Still Waters

When I think of young love, I imagine a beautiful landscape as the background. In my mind’s eye, I can see fluffy, white clouds in a sunny, blue sky over a lush, green meadow. The happy couple frolics in delight, basking in the freedom of enjoying each other’s company. This is part of the dream I hoped would one day come true for me when I met my significant other.

Even more beautiful imagery is described in Psalm 23 and John 10. The Lord is depicted as a loving shepherd who will not allow any needs of His sheep to be unmet. Psalm 23:2 says, “He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.” This addresses their need for food and water by giving them fresh grass to eat and quiet spring water to drink.

Jesus takes this further in John 10:11: “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” In addition to food and water, sheep need protection. Shepherds risk their lives to protect their sheep from predators out of love for the helpless animals. Jesus, as our Good Shepherd, laid down His life for us by His own choice (10:18). Then He took back His life when He rose again, so He could tend to His beloved sheep forever.

The thought of entering green pastures and gazing upon still waters alone brings an amazing sense of peace. Having the Lord’s presence and protection with us on top of that makes it even better. This is the kind of peace we enjoy when we allow the Lord to lead us. “Goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” (Psalm 23:6) Under the Lord’s care, these peaceful moments in flourishing, green meadows are our inheritance for all time.

Spiritual Growth

Several passages in the Bible use imagery related to plant life to show how God cultivates His children’s spiritual growth. One such verse is found in Isaiah 61:11 – “For as the earth brings forth its sprouts, and as a garden causes what is sown in it to sprout up, so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to sprout up before all the nations.”

Matthew 13 includes the parable of the sower, where four types of soil are described. The moral of this parable is that we want to be like the good soil, which allows the Word to take root and bear good fruit.

On the topic of fruit, we are encouraged in Galatians 5 to grow the fruit of the Spirit. This includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

The last passage I will mention is John 15. In this chapter, Jesus paints the picture of a vineyard. “I am the vine; you are the branches,” He tells us. “Whoever abides in Me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

Without Christ, we are like dry branches fallen to the ground. But when we abide in Him and He abides in us, we are filled with life and quickly develop good fruit on green branches. He then fulfills His purposes for us and multiplies His good fruit as new seeds are planted. Then joy, life, love and peace abound and the process repeats, as it will until His wonderful garden work is complete (Philippians 1:6).

This post is part of the 2023 Colors of Love series. Other posts in the series cover orange, red, gray, white, black, purple, blue and yellow.